questingly (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
questingly) wrote2019-12-31 11:40 am
questingly) wrote2019-12-31 11:40 am
2019 end of year fic review meme
2019: Fic Year in Review
This year, I've been working on what's come to be known as The Fic (alternativey the c-drama fic or the neo emperor redux fic) which is, still, unfortunately incomplete and therefore unposted. But I *did* write, and want to acknowledge that for myself!
The Stats:
☆ Total Word Count: 65k of the fic + 31k
☆ Total Fics Written: 3 + The Fic
☆ Fandoms Written In: vi..x.x....
Chronological list:
☆ january:
The Fic ep 11-13
☆ march:
love bites | vixx (n/leo) | nc17 | 4358
The Fic ep 15-16
☆ may:
The Fic ep 17
☆ june:
The Fic ep 18
☆ july:
The Fic ep 19-21
☆ august:
The Fic ep 22
☆ september:
The Fic ep 23
☆ october:
puppy love | vixx (ken/leo) | nc17 | 17500
☆ november:
The Fic ep 24-26
all of me (your guilty pleasure) | vixx (leo/all) | nc17 | 9435
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ Overall Thoughts ✿
🌲 Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted?
I find this hard to tell, because I was really hoping I could finish The Fic this year, but at the same time I'm pleased I wrote at all, with the way this year unfolded (busy. very busy.). I am a little upset at myself about the fests/exchanges I had to drop out of though, but acknowledge it was probably for the best!
🌲 What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January?
After ??? time, I finally wrote that leo gangbang.
🌲 What’s your own favourite story of the year?
I am personally fond of love bites because it's the sort of cute and funny that I really like! There are a few scenes in The Fic I also like: the second scene of Ep 16, Ep 19-20 (the pre-battle and battle scenes), and the scene in Ep 23 labelled "sq gives hb a heart attack". Although really, everything with Hongbin? Perfect. And while the scene itself makes me hurt inside, being able to write in 'mom's gay love story' warms the cockles of my cold dead heart.
🌲 Did you take any writing risks this year?
I'm still working on The Fic, even though I've thought of quitting a couple times! I also embarked on some Deadline Fic - which I admittedly only finished one of. This was also the first time I've written a battle scene in... quite a few years. On one hand I think I like how it turned out, on the other, it's rather stomach turning (as intended, somewhat).
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ From my past year of writing, what was… ✿
🌲 My best story of this year:
Mmf.
🌲 My most popular story of this year:
love bites! but it was also posted in march and the other two posted in october and november haha.
🌲 Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:
I can't wait to be able to post The Fic, but first I need to finish writing The Fic.
🌲 Most fun story to write:
Mmf. love bites?
🌲 Story with the single sexiest moment:
Ooh boy. Time to make a new question!
🌲 Story with the single cutest/sweetest moment:
I!! love!! the end!! of all of me!!!! Cuddling! Soft! Old married couple! Domesticity!!!!!!
🌲 Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story:
Part of me is like, 'leo gangbang', part of me is going 'hybrid au', part of me is *stares into the distance thinking of The Fic*. There's a few scenes in there that does make me uncomfortable, especially when it comes to Hongbin and references to his past and every time his role/place in society gets explicitly brought up. Honestly, I also find myself feeling some sort of visceral reaction every time I look at that battle scene, because that is some Graphic Violence right there.
🌲 Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters:
Since I'm writing something that's very heavily AU, the characters in the fic are pulling further and further away from 'canon' as they develop and evolve within the context of the fic. One thing I have been noticing though is Sanghyuk's development - because his age in fic is at the cusp of his own development in 'canon', as he goes from boy to man.
🌲 Hardest story to write:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAA
Ahem. There were so many tough scenes in The Fic to write this time around, and they were all hard in different ways. The scenes where Hakyeon believes he's leaving to never see hissoulmate adopted brother ever again. The scenes labelled 'oops.' Anything involving death and grief is, by its very nature, hard to write, because writing puts you face to face with it. And this has been a hard year, to have to face such things.
🌲 Biggest disappointment:
HOW AM I STILL NOT DONE THE FIC. But also having to drop out of the fests and exchanges I signed up for.
🌲 Biggest surprise:
I??? Finally???? wrote????? the g*ngbang???? Also liteally the only things I've posted this year are p*rn.
🌲 Most unintentionally telling story:
There were definitely a few moments in The Fic, but I think the battle scene surprised even myself with how violent some of the descriptions were, which is a part of myself I thought I'd left behind in a way (I used to write a lot of war fics/battle scenes, until they were second nature).but also maybe hakyeon punching taekwoon in the face not that you know i want to see them bruised and bloodied or anything.
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ Favourite Opening Lines: ✿
(not quite the very first lines)
"So you're offering blood, sex, and companionship in exchange for a... burger." The vampire leaned back in his chair, fingers laced together, his hands resting on the table.
"I'm not very good at companionship," Taekwoon admitted.
"So blood and sex."
A nod. "And nice burgers." Taekwoon paused, wondering if he should push his luck. His tongue flickered over his lips in uncertainty, but it was better to make it clear now. "I like ramen. And barbecue meat. Maybe a steak."
The vampire laughed, bright and delightful.
"Very well. If these terms are acceptable to you, I don't see why not," the vampire said. He stuck his hand out. "Cha Hakyeon. Good to meet you."
"Taekwoon," he said. He shook the vampire's outstretched hand, his grip firm and cool.
- love bites
✿ Favourite Closing Lines: ✿
It was equal parts sweet and bitter, and unknowing of the truth behind the truth, Taekwoon drank it all.
- episode 11
✿ Favourite lines from anywhere: ✿
YELLS INTO THE DISTANCE
"Mother, may your daughter ask a question?" Song Qian ventured.
"Always, my dear child," Meiying said.
"Did you love her?"
"As much as I was allowed to," Meiying answered. She spoke without hesitation. She again looked away into the distance, at the dull blue sky. "For as long as I was allowed to."
Did she love you? Song Qian knew she'd never know the answer to that question, nor would she ever ask.
- episode 18
incredibly nsfw
But this time, Hakyeon made good on his promise. He sat up and fucked into Taekwoon hard, hard enough that Taekwoon slid up the bed. Taekwoon gripped the bed sheets, holding tighter to Hakyeon's waist with his legs. A faint sheen of sweat was building on Hakyeon's face and Hakyeon's gaze turned intense. It was like a switch had been flipped and Taekwoon loved it, loved the way it looked like Hakyeon wanted to eat him. Taekwoon pushed into Hakyeon, matching his thrusts, his exhaustion momentarily forgotten. It was exhilarating, the way Hakyeon fucked into him smooth and relentlessly, until that was all Taekwoon was aware of. His eyes had closed again, but that was alright, because he knew Hakyeon as keenly as if he was seeing him, feeling Hakyeon fill him up from inside, as if they were joined by more than physical touch. He reached for Hakyeon again, and Hakyeon clasped Taekwoon's hand bringing it up to his own face, so Taekwoon's palm was pressed against Hakyeon's cheek, and Hakyeon's palm against the back of Taekwoon's hand. It was wonderfully warm in every way possible, and it was over too soon as Hakyeon came with a small, quiet cry. Taekwoon sat up, bracing himself with one hand and kissed Hakyeon, pulling him as close as he could. Hakyeon shuddered in his embrace as his orgasm coursed through him, and Taekwoon ground his hips down until Hakyeon fell limply against him, breaths coming hard, Hakyeon's sweat damp hair against Taekwoon's forehead.
- all of me (your guilty pleasure)
Jaehwan stared at him and there was no trace of the amusement or quirky playfulness that was so common for Jaehwan. Long seconds of silence stretched on and Hakyeon had to resist the urge to look away. With all that stripped away, what was left in Jaehwan's eyes was a haunted exhaustion that Hakyeon recognised too deeply from himself. Jaehwan may never have ridden to battle but he'd seen no less than Hakyeon, living in the gilded battles of both courtly politics and petty courts. They were the outsiders, the observers, younger sons and adopted kin. They were not the actors and the stakes were not their own, but the stakes were just as dear.
- episode 15
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ Looking back at 2019: ✿
This was a really interesting year for me, with some really big life changes being implemented (August to December is a bit of a fever dream). It was also a bit of an emotional roller coaster, for reasons I think many of us share. I still want to look back and tell myself 'you did well', because what matters is that I still wrote! Even if it's not very good, even if it's not very much, it's still something. Ultimately, I think dropping out of the fests was the correct choice, and taking a break this month was also the right choice. Given how much travelling I did during November, I'm amazed at myself for writing as much as I did! (Thanks NaNo!) I wrote some really tough scenes emotionally - it took a lot of time, but I did it! I finished two (2) things on time, and one of those things was something I've been (kind of) meaning to write for a while. So all in all, I think I did well! I regret not being able to participate in the usual December fests, but I'm proud of myself for knowing and setting my own limits and boundaries.
✿ Fic-writing goals for 2020: ✿
FOR FUCKING REAL PLEASE LET ME FINISH THE FIC. No idea when it's going to happen (take a month long vacation in China and live in the Starbucks closest to my grandparents' apartment?) but please... Also, to reread The Fic in January. If I can stop falling asleep.
Also to be more positive about my own writing! This is the first step!
This year, I've been working on what's come to be known as The Fic (alternativey the c-drama fic or the neo emperor redux fic) which is, still, unfortunately incomplete and therefore unposted. But I *did* write, and want to acknowledge that for myself!
The Stats:
☆ Total Word Count: 65k of the fic + 31k
☆ Total Fics Written: 3 + The Fic
☆ Fandoms Written In: vi..x.x....
Chronological list:
☆ january:
The Fic ep 11-13
☆ march:
love bites | vixx (n/leo) | nc17 | 4358
The Fic ep 15-16
☆ may:
The Fic ep 17
☆ june:
The Fic ep 18
☆ july:
The Fic ep 19-21
☆ august:
The Fic ep 22
☆ september:
The Fic ep 23
☆ october:
puppy love | vixx (ken/leo) | nc17 | 17500
☆ november:
The Fic ep 24-26
all of me (your guilty pleasure) | vixx (leo/all) | nc17 | 9435
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ Overall Thoughts ✿
🌲 Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted?
I find this hard to tell, because I was really hoping I could finish The Fic this year, but at the same time I'm pleased I wrote at all, with the way this year unfolded (busy. very busy.). I am a little upset at myself about the fests/exchanges I had to drop out of though, but acknowledge it was probably for the best!
🌲 What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January?
After ??? time, I finally wrote that leo gangbang.
🌲 What’s your own favourite story of the year?
I am personally fond of love bites because it's the sort of cute and funny that I really like! There are a few scenes in The Fic I also like: the second scene of Ep 16, Ep 19-20 (the pre-battle and battle scenes), and the scene in Ep 23 labelled "sq gives hb a heart attack". Although really, everything with Hongbin? Perfect. And while the scene itself makes me hurt inside, being able to write in 'mom's gay love story' warms the cockles of my cold dead heart.
🌲 Did you take any writing risks this year?
I'm still working on The Fic, even though I've thought of quitting a couple times! I also embarked on some Deadline Fic - which I admittedly only finished one of. This was also the first time I've written a battle scene in... quite a few years. On one hand I think I like how it turned out, on the other, it's rather stomach turning (as intended, somewhat).
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ From my past year of writing, what was… ✿
🌲 My best story of this year:
Mmf.
🌲 My most popular story of this year:
love bites! but it was also posted in march and the other two posted in october and november haha.
🌲 Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:
I can't wait to be able to post The Fic, but first I need to finish writing The Fic.
🌲 Most fun story to write:
Mmf. love bites?
🌲 Story with the single sexiest moment:
Ooh boy. Time to make a new question!
🌲 Story with the single cutest/sweetest moment:
I!! love!! the end!! of all of me!!!! Cuddling! Soft! Old married couple! Domesticity!!!!!!
🌲 Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story:
Part of me is like, 'leo gangbang', part of me is going 'hybrid au', part of me is *stares into the distance thinking of The Fic*. There's a few scenes in there that does make me uncomfortable, especially when it comes to Hongbin and references to his past and every time his role/place in society gets explicitly brought up. Honestly, I also find myself feeling some sort of visceral reaction every time I look at that battle scene, because that is some Graphic Violence right there.
🌲 Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters:
Since I'm writing something that's very heavily AU, the characters in the fic are pulling further and further away from 'canon' as they develop and evolve within the context of the fic. One thing I have been noticing though is Sanghyuk's development - because his age in fic is at the cusp of his own development in 'canon', as he goes from boy to man.
🌲 Hardest story to write:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAA
Ahem. There were so many tough scenes in The Fic to write this time around, and they were all hard in different ways. The scenes where Hakyeon believes he's leaving to never see his
🌲 Biggest disappointment:
HOW AM I STILL NOT DONE THE FIC. But also having to drop out of the fests and exchanges I signed up for.
🌲 Biggest surprise:
I??? Finally???? wrote????? the g*ngbang???? Also liteally the only things I've posted this year are p*rn.
🌲 Most unintentionally telling story:
There were definitely a few moments in The Fic, but I think the battle scene surprised even myself with how violent some of the descriptions were, which is a part of myself I thought I'd left behind in a way (I used to write a lot of war fics/battle scenes, until they were second nature).
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ Favourite Opening Lines: ✿
(not quite the very first lines)
"So you're offering blood, sex, and companionship in exchange for a... burger." The vampire leaned back in his chair, fingers laced together, his hands resting on the table.
"I'm not very good at companionship," Taekwoon admitted.
"So blood and sex."
A nod. "And nice burgers." Taekwoon paused, wondering if he should push his luck. His tongue flickered over his lips in uncertainty, but it was better to make it clear now. "I like ramen. And barbecue meat. Maybe a steak."
The vampire laughed, bright and delightful.
"Very well. If these terms are acceptable to you, I don't see why not," the vampire said. He stuck his hand out. "Cha Hakyeon. Good to meet you."
"Taekwoon," he said. He shook the vampire's outstretched hand, his grip firm and cool.
- love bites
✿ Favourite Closing Lines: ✿
It was equal parts sweet and bitter, and unknowing of the truth behind the truth, Taekwoon drank it all.
- episode 11
✿ Favourite lines from anywhere: ✿
YELLS INTO THE DISTANCE
"Mother, may your daughter ask a question?" Song Qian ventured.
"Always, my dear child," Meiying said.
"Did you love her?"
"As much as I was allowed to," Meiying answered. She spoke without hesitation. She again looked away into the distance, at the dull blue sky. "For as long as I was allowed to."
Did she love you? Song Qian knew she'd never know the answer to that question, nor would she ever ask.
- episode 18
incredibly nsfw
But this time, Hakyeon made good on his promise. He sat up and fucked into Taekwoon hard, hard enough that Taekwoon slid up the bed. Taekwoon gripped the bed sheets, holding tighter to Hakyeon's waist with his legs. A faint sheen of sweat was building on Hakyeon's face and Hakyeon's gaze turned intense. It was like a switch had been flipped and Taekwoon loved it, loved the way it looked like Hakyeon wanted to eat him. Taekwoon pushed into Hakyeon, matching his thrusts, his exhaustion momentarily forgotten. It was exhilarating, the way Hakyeon fucked into him smooth and relentlessly, until that was all Taekwoon was aware of. His eyes had closed again, but that was alright, because he knew Hakyeon as keenly as if he was seeing him, feeling Hakyeon fill him up from inside, as if they were joined by more than physical touch. He reached for Hakyeon again, and Hakyeon clasped Taekwoon's hand bringing it up to his own face, so Taekwoon's palm was pressed against Hakyeon's cheek, and Hakyeon's palm against the back of Taekwoon's hand. It was wonderfully warm in every way possible, and it was over too soon as Hakyeon came with a small, quiet cry. Taekwoon sat up, bracing himself with one hand and kissed Hakyeon, pulling him as close as he could. Hakyeon shuddered in his embrace as his orgasm coursed through him, and Taekwoon ground his hips down until Hakyeon fell limply against him, breaths coming hard, Hakyeon's sweat damp hair against Taekwoon's forehead.
- all of me (your guilty pleasure)
Jaehwan stared at him and there was no trace of the amusement or quirky playfulness that was so common for Jaehwan. Long seconds of silence stretched on and Hakyeon had to resist the urge to look away. With all that stripped away, what was left in Jaehwan's eyes was a haunted exhaustion that Hakyeon recognised too deeply from himself. Jaehwan may never have ridden to battle but he'd seen no less than Hakyeon, living in the gilded battles of both courtly politics and petty courts. They were the outsiders, the observers, younger sons and adopted kin. They were not the actors and the stakes were not their own, but the stakes were just as dear.
- episode 15
🟊 🟊 🟊
✿ Looking back at 2019: ✿
This was a really interesting year for me, with some really big life changes being implemented (August to December is a bit of a fever dream). It was also a bit of an emotional roller coaster, for reasons I think many of us share. I still want to look back and tell myself 'you did well', because what matters is that I still wrote! Even if it's not very good, even if it's not very much, it's still something. Ultimately, I think dropping out of the fests was the correct choice, and taking a break this month was also the right choice. Given how much travelling I did during November, I'm amazed at myself for writing as much as I did! (Thanks NaNo!) I wrote some really tough scenes emotionally - it took a lot of time, but I did it! I finished two (2) things on time, and one of those things was something I've been (kind of) meaning to write for a while. So all in all, I think I did well! I regret not being able to participate in the usual December fests, but I'm proud of myself for knowing and setting my own limits and boundaries.
✿ Fic-writing goals for 2020: ✿
FOR FUCKING REAL PLEASE LET ME FINISH THE FIC. No idea when it's going to happen (take a month long vacation in China and live in the Starbucks closest to my grandparents' apartment?) but please... Also, to reread The Fic in January. If I can stop falling asleep.
Also to be more positive about my own writing! This is the first step!